NBC’s Today Show Offers 3 Tips on Protecting Yourself …But Something’s Strangely Missing

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It’s prime time for home invasions, the Today Show tells us. The weather is still warm…and well, that’s all the explanation they give. Apparently warm weather provokes intruders. Probably something else we can blame on climate change.

Because your home could be invaded at any time, the folks at NBC want to make sure you know how to protect yourself. In a segment called Rossen Reports, they teach us the 3 tips for home invasion defense every American should know.

NBC’s Foolproof Plan of Defense:

1. Keep Your Car Keys By the Bed
By keeping your car keys close by in the middle of the night, you can set off your car alarm when you hear an intruder. NBC doesn’t have time to go into details about how this will protect you and your family, but presumably your neighbors will be sufficiently annoyed to come to your rescue?

2. Keep Wasp & Hornet Spray By the Bed
If the car alarm isn’t good enough to send your invader running in terror, you need to be ready for their primary attack. Once they reach the bedroom, you need to have a weapon. What better weapon than a can of bug spray? Fire a stream of poisonous spray into your attackers eyes, blinding him temporarily. Careful, though. If your invader(s) have a can of spray themselves, you must not cross the streams. That would be bad.

3. Never Lie to Your Invader
According to NBC’s home security adviser, you must prepare for the possibility that (somehow) the bug spray and the car alarm fail to stop the intruders. If captured and tied up in the living room, be forthright and honest about where your valuables are. Home invaders, in the ideal world of the Today Show, only want to steal your material goods apparently.

Strangely, something seemed to be missing from NBC’s approach to home security defense. While obviously wasp & hornet spray is one of the most effective weapons ever devised, what about…a gun?

Well, the Today Show was mum on the subject, pretending throughout the 5 minute segment that there existed no such thing. Not one mention of firearms was made throughout the Rossen Report.

The left is fond of parroting statistics that suggest having a gun in the home makes a home invasion even more dangerous. They say that it is just as likely that the invader will gain control of the gun as it is that you will kill them. But many of these home invasions-gone-wrong involve people who have armed themselves without really preparing for the worst. And that’s the real trouble with NBC’s report.

Guns are a necessary and effective form of home protection, but they aren’t equivalent to a force field of safety. To use one in the middle of the most terrifying situation of your life, you’d better be damn ready. That means training. Training + Preparedness + A Gun gives you your best chance of survival.

Or go with the bug spray. It’s up to you.